Two way sex chats
I don’t know how to navigate figuring things out in my Wasatch Front culture.
Today my sister said “when I was in jr high I thought sex was __ and__ and then I figured out it was so much more”.
I received a compelling email from a senior in high school and I would love to get your help answering it.
It’s such a sincere, honest email with such heartfelt questions about an important topic. Here’s the email (with her name changed and any identifying facts removed): Hi Gabrielle, My name is Lisa and I’m a senior in high school living in a medium-size city in Utah (I’ll be heading to BYU in the fall). I’m emailing you for advice among all people in the world because a) you’re a mom b) you’re LDS, and c) I like what you have to say especially about tricky topics like this. Today I was talking to my college age sister about a terrible law of chastity lesson I had in seminary and explained my frustration about how Mormons have such an unhealthy way about discussing sex.
Thanks a lot, Lisa —- Dear Lisa, Thank you so much for your email. As you know from our exchanges, I’m going to respond publicly here, and I also want Design Mom Readers to respond, because I think this is a topic that benefits from many experiences and many points of view. Second, I don’t know you or your parents, but based on what you wrote, and your confidence, I think they seem pretty great.
I can see you have a ton of confidence just to write it up and send it. I also think you are not the only 18 year old that feels this way. So I’m hoping this public post can be a help to others who feel just like you. And I would 100% recommend that you share this same email with them — both your mother and father — and tell them you want to have a series of open, frank conversations about sex with them.
But until you’re actually having sex on a regular basis, a lot of what you learn or hear won’t really be helpful or make sense.
And the good news is, I can tell you from experience, the more parents talk about sex with their kids, the less awkward and uncomfortable it is.
Sex is very normal, and not talking about it is what makes it seem weird, uncomfortable and not-normal.
2) Sex has to be learned, it’s not like breathing or blinking.
So if two people have never had sex and they decide to start having sex, it might not be much fun at first.