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Another way to lead your partner into it if you’re both feeling awkward, is to set up a roleplay scenario. For example, “Remember when we were in Aruba and I was teasing you on the beach with my cleavage and later the sex was soooo hot?Lauren suggests, “Imagine I’m a sex robot you can program to do whatever you want. Imagine if I had done [insert alternative sexy activity].” Some jumping off points, should you need: “What if you realized I was wearing a strap-on under my bikini?Let’s say, you really love the fantasy of public sex, but you know, don’t have any actual plans to follow through on that.Phone sex is a great and safe place to talk about the things you wouldn’t or couldn’t do in real life.Although laughing through the awkwardness may work for some people, if it takes you out of the moment, try redirecting to an earlier point of the conversation. I bet you can imagine my warm lips on your penis right now.” Or shift the onus back to your partner with a hot potato-y “tell me more about what you’d do to me."Let’s say your partner goes from 0–60 real fast and starts calling you names you find disrespectful.It’s important for both parties to understand that it’s okay to call a "detour" (detour is a word that can keep things moving, as opposed to stop).

Although, phone sex quickies can be just as hot too Imagine you had that sexy conversation right as your partner was about to leave work and come home?

You might find yourself following along with your partner’s imagination, or you might be taking the reins yourself.

If you’re shy, your partner might only need to know that you’re a willing participant to take off and lead for you.

Phone sex is a great platform for testing the waters for your secret fantasies.

Say something like, “I confess I’ve always wanted you to go down on me while I rant about that totally passive aggressive thing my roommate did” or “I confess that I fantasize about understanding what a vaginal orgasm feels like.” Finding out your partner’s “confessions” are, can be great fodder for future phone sex fantasies.

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